CHALO HASTE HAIN- JOKES- CHUTKALE
Kya aapko marne ke baad bhi ladko/ladkiyon ko line maarni hai??……………
“DONATE YOUR EYES”
Ek aache message ko kaise-kaise batana pad raha hai..Kalyug hai!!!
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Boy-Wat is ur age?
Girl-we girls dont say our age 2 boys..!
Boy-ok whats your Email?
Girl-priya1985@gmail.com..!
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Husband asks : Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means...
Without Information, Fighting Everytime !!
WIFE says : No darling , it means
With Idiot For Ever
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Boss : We need someone for this Job, who is Responsible.
Santa : Sir, your search ends here, in my previous job,
whenever anything went wrong, they said I am Responsible...
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HR Manager Asked Banta in an Interview.
"Can you spell a word that has more than 75 Letters in it?"
Banta confidently Replied: "Letter Box"
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Golu : Mom kya aapne mujhe paida hone se pehle dekha tha?
Mom : Nahi to beta!
Golu : To phir paida hone ke baad aapne mujhe pehchana kaise??
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Santa: Madam, Can I Go To The Bathroom?
Madam corrected that wrong sentence: May I Go To The Bathroom?
Santa: But I Asked First
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Kappu: Aap kitna padhe ho?
Pappu: B.A.
Kappu: kamal karte ho yaar, sirf do word padhe aur woh bhi ulte
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After a big accident, a man was crying : O God! I have lost my left hand?
Santa: Control yourself my friend. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost
his head. Is he crying?
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Teacher: what do u call a person who cannot hear anything?
Santa: U can call him anything, because he cannot hear anything.
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Boss hangs a poster in office(jokes)
'I am the boss, dont forget'
He returns from lunch,
finds a slip on his desk,
'ur wife called, she wants her poster back home..!!'
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A beautiful girl asked me in a restaurant, "Are you single?"
I happily replied, "Yes..."
She took away the extra chair in front of me!
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Ladko ko sabse jayada Gussa kab ata hai??
Jab 1 ladka 2 cute sweet Girls ke Bich Baitha ho
tab tisri ladki ke aane ke baad Autowala kahta hai-Bhai tu aage aaja
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Wife : Ye aap ki shirt per lipstick ka nishan
kahan se aaya?
Husband : Mein khud paresaan hu nishan dekhkar.
Maine tu uss wakt shirt utari hui thi.
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Jyotish ladke ke haath dekhkar bola
“Beta tum bahut padhoge”
Ladka : Saale padh to mein 4 saal se raha hu,
ye bata paas kab hounga???
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Stadium Indian Pakistan cricket match chal raha tha
1 Gorgeous ladki ne hoto par “India” ke tirange
ka
tattoo laga rakha tha Ek ladka aaya aur hoto
par “kiss” kar gaya aur bola, “I LOVE MY INDIA”
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Mom: Sofa letne ke liye nahi hota baithne ke liye hota hai
Son: Ha toh Chappal bhi maarne k liye nahi pehen ne ke liye hoti hai..
Ek chappl aur padi..
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Bus running,
Jhatka laga,
1 ladka 1 ladki pe ja gira
Ladki boli batameez;
Kya kar rahe ho…?
Ladka bola…
University se B.A kar raha hoon.
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Madam- sab bachchon se poochhti hai: batao sabase jyaada baarish kahaan par padtee hai.
Santa: zameen par.
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Naukrani: Malkin Aap Udaas kyo hai...
Malkin: Tumhare sahab apne office ki kisi ladki se pyar karte hain...
Naukrani: Nahii, Sahab Mujhe dhokha nahi de sakte
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A Secretary came angrily out of boss cabin
colleague asked: Wat happened?
She replied: He asked me are U free tonight?
I said-yes & Bastard give me 101 pages of work.
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Premika: Main maa banne wali hoon,
Premi: Kya bakwas kar rahi ho..
Premika: Bakwas nahi, main tumhare papa se shaadi kar ke tumhari maa banne wali hoo.
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A father was teaching
the spelling of word “ASSASSINATION”
to his child.
.
He says:
ek Gadha(ASS),
uspar ek aur Gadha(ASS)
jispar Mein(I),
aur mujh par sara Desh(Nation)
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Dehaati Aurat Cheque Cash karane gai
Clerk- Sign karo
Aurat- Kaise?
Clerk- Jaise Khat k end me likhti ho.
Aurat ne likha-
"TOHAR CHUMMA KE INTEJAR Me, BiiiJLi.!
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Father-Beta agar sasural wale
Scooter de to Car magna,
Shop de to Ghar mangna,
Coolar de to AC mangna.
Beta- Papa agar wo Ladki de
to kya sath me uski dusri bahan vi mang lu?
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Titu apni saliyo ke liye chudiyan lekar aya
Saliya: jiju ap aphi pahna do haath me chudiyan
Titu :agar pehale pata hota to chudiya ke jagah sunder chaddi le ke ata.
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Nikhattu ko beedi ki lat lag gayee
uske papa ne lat chhudane ke liye use
baba raamdevki Yoga class me bheja
aur phir
Papu aab paon se bhi beedi pee leta hai
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Kamina Bacha !
Son: dad, aap ki Love Marrige hui thi na?
Dad: Ha ! Par tumhe kaise pata?
Son: Q ki aapki shadi or meri Date of Birth me sirf 5 month ka FARQ hai !!
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